Saturday, January 30, 2010

I've gone GaGa

RAh RAh Ro-MAH MAH, oooh LA, OH GAGA !!!

I walk around singing this song all day long. At first I was scared of Lady Gaga in the same way that Grace Jones scares the living crap out of me. Androgyny is a quick way to get me to leave the room. Yet, I recently saw an interview that she did on the Fuse channel. Maybe it was because I was delirious from having a tummy bug but she started to make sense to me.

She's like this horrible accident on the side of the freeway. You don't want to look, yet, you can't look away.

So...here ya go. I'm not saying that the lady is not a freakazoid but she's actually articulate. Anyone who is a fan of Andy Warhol is okay by me.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Freakshow Friday: Heavy Metal Edition

It's time for another installment of Freakshow Friday. Where I ask my readers to come up with a caption or story for a funny photo. This week's photo was submitted by the lovely Kate from Busted Plumbing. She scouted it on FAIL Blog. Thanks Kate!!

Even as a child Bret Michaels yearned for his Rock of Love

You got a better one for me?
If so, you may just when this awesome award
and have bragging rights forever.


We all know that you have a big mouth
so put it to good use and spread the word about this little contest.
After you leave your hilarious comment
could you please be a lamb
and invite one smart ass friend to come and play too?
We need some fresh meat around here.

If you win then I'll linkup to your
Blog and make a big deal
about how funny you are.
Simply leave your funny caption or story
in my comments section.

The winner will be announced on Monday.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Cartoons and Tummy Bugs!

My world had been a mess this week. Griffin has been a pitiful puny wreck and I haven't brushed my hair in two days. Let me tell you something else, when you have two kids and one is sick and the other is going through separation anxiety, it is not fun. There is one upset child at all times. I can't have Koen perched on my hip as I rub Griffin's back as he's worshipping the porcelain god. That just seems wrong. So, Koen has been stuck and spent extended amounts of time in his Jumaproo in the hallway outside the bathroom door, screaming baby obscenities at the top of his lungs as Griffin weeps and moans. It's been awesome.

Only one thing has made this week barerable and that is the Boomerang Network. Are you familiar with Boomerang? Oh...it's just a little piece of Seventies Heaven right here on earth.
They play a constant stream of cartoons from when I was a kid. Stuff like...


Hong Kong Phooey

The Smurfs

The Jetsons

Richie Rich

So, I was planning on pontificating about the nostalgia of watching my favourite cartoons with my kid right about now. I even thought about doing a social commentary on how anti-feminist the Flintstones are but, guess who came down the tummy bug? That's right-little ol' me.

Thank God I typed up this post last night before it hit me.

I'm off to eat crushed ice and listen to my baby yell obscenities at me while I'm holed up in the bathroom.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Look, I'm domestic AND skinny.

I've lost 8 pounds on Weight Watchers!
In celebration I'm going to share with you
a recipe that I have made 3 times in the last 3 weeks.
How domestic of me, huh?

Enjoy!

(this is not a picture of food that I made)


Mini White Pizzas with Vegetables
Points Value: 5

4 (6 inch) Whole Wheat pitas
Olive oil-flavored cooking spray
1 Medium zucchini, thinly sliced
1/4 cup thinly sliced red onion, separated into rings
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup light garlic and herbs spreadable cheese (such as Alouette Light)
6 tablespoons Asiago Cheese

(I use hummus instead of Alouette and I add crumbled Feta
sometimes I even add Rotisserie Chicken)

1. Preheat Broiler
2.Place pitas on baking sheet: broil 3 minutes
3.Heat a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat; coat pan with cooking spray.
Add zucchini, onion, black pepper, and salt. saute 3 minutes or until vegetables
are crisp-tender
4. Remove pitas from oven, spread 2 tablespoons garlic and herb spreadable cheese over pita.
Top evenly with vegetables and Asiago cheese. Broil 3 minutes or until cheese melts.

Then, I pop open a Topo Chico.

Aye Papi!!!



This is the best Mineral Water I have ever had. You can get it at any Mexican Market or you might luck out and they'll have it available on the "International Aisle" of your grocery store. You can make it super yummy by squeezing a little lime in it. You could even get crazy and put in a shot of Vodka.

MMMMM...Muy Bueno!!
Mami Likes!!


BTW...thanks for your well wishes yesterday. I think that I've nursed Griffin back to health and the rest of us have not come down with it at this point. Whew...that was a close one!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

I'm a little busy.

Griffin has a Tummy Bug.
Things are rather glamorous over at our house.
Let's just say that I'm keeping the Lysol people in business.

If you happen to be the praying kind
say a little prayer for Griffin's tummy.
While you're at it-
say a prayer that me and the baby
don't come down with it too.

I'll see you when all is well in the homestead.


Monday, January 25, 2010

For the love of writing.

The Fiction Writing Workshop that I went to over the weekend was a smashing success. I walked away feeling all fired up about writing, which was why I went. So, mission accomplished. It wasn't so much that I learned great writing techniques or that one piece of advice that will make me famous. No, this was a quiet awakening within me that reminded me that I write simply because I love to write.

Fortune and glory would be nice and openly welcomed, of course. Yet, I remembered how much I enjoy the process of writing. This should not be a struggle and my first draft does not have to be perfect. I need to write it dirty. Simply sit down and get the idea out of my head and then go back and refine it. I need to think less about my audience and write for me because the perfect reader for this story is me. I need to trust myself more. Thanks to that fella that I though was going to be Hack...

I am having a love affair with words again.

Winner: Hugs not drugs edition

We have a winner for the latest installment of Freakshow Friday. Please take note that my super freaky and non-biased best friend was the judge yet again. Here are the top three in no particular order.
Moooooog35
The last known photo of Jenny before she was traded for an 8-ball.

Moooooog35

..and after he sobered up, Ben figured it was best to just get the marriage annulled.

mindy2780

And forever afterwards Sarah regretted
telling Dan to just wear whatever the f* he pleased and smile for the picture.

The winner is

Moooooog35


..and after he sobered up,
Ben figured it was best to just get the marriage annulled.

Moooooog35
the funniest Blogger in all the land.
Please head on over to his Blog
and marvel at this fantastic award he just earned
to proudly display forever.


Thanks to all the people who played.
Tune in this Friday for another instalment of Freakshow Friday!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Freakshow Friday: Hugs not drugs edition

It's time for another instalment of Freakshow Friday. Where I ask my readers to come up with a caption or story for a photo taken from Awkward Family Photos. My best friend will be the judge and she's super flippin' funny so watch out!

I think that this week's photo is awesome.

Reason number 1001 that Billy never made Father of the Year.

You got a better one for me?
If so, you may just when this awesome award
and have bragging rights forever.


We all know that you have a big mouth
so put it to good use and spread the word about this little contest.
After you leave your hilarious comment
could you please be a lamb
and invite one smart ass friend to come and play too?
We need some fresh meat around here.

If you win then I'll linkup to your
Blog and make a big deal
about how funny you are.
Simply leave your funny caption or story
in my comments section.

The winner will be announced on Monday.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Can this man teach me to be a top selling novelist?

This gentleman is leading a fiction writing seminar that I am going to this weekend. I'm scared of his black cat and I'm a little scared that he posed like that with his cat. Yet, I am mustering up all of my courage and heading over to a tiny library in Oconee County to have him bestow his wisdom upon me, whoever he is.

I'm doing this because I need some direction. My novel is half way finished and although I have the rest outlined, I am blocked. It's not flowing. I have 167 pages down and I'm so ready to get it finished.

Plus, my Mom offered to watch the kids and Roger has some work that he needs to do around the house and if I go to this thing then I get an afternoon to myself and I get out of a boring trip to Home Depot and the tedious task of home improvement.

Yeah, but I really do want to finish this novel.
So, Brian Jay Corrigan,

YOU BETTER BRING IT!!!

This is the part where I imagine that he raises his pen over his head and yells "Oh...I already done brought it!" and scares his black cat who then proceeds to jump, hiss, and attach himself to Mr. Corrigan's face. In a fit of panic, Mr. Corrigan stabs his cat in the eye with his pen mere moments before he slips in a pool of his own blood.

See, I'm already feeling more creative.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

The moment that I've been waiting for has finally come.


When I was twenty-something years old, I found these vintage juice glasses at an Antique Market in Madison, Georgia. I couldn't pass them up and I bought them with the intention that one day my children would drink Orange Juice from them. I perched them lovingly on the windowsill in the kitchen and would admire the sunlight shining through them and daydream about my future.

Over the years, whenever I moved into a new place, I would unwrap each one and as I placed them in the window of my new kitchen I would say out loud "Now, I'm home." They moved with me six times and I've broken a few but they sit over my sink to this day. I love these little Juice glasses because they were bought with love. They symbolize all that I've achieved and all that I longed for many years. I have a little family just like I wished for in my morning ritual.

I had yet to serve Griffin any juice in them because he is a rambunctious scamp and I didn't want him to break them. The other day, he asked me about the little glasses in the windowsill. "Can I hold one?" he asked me. He studied each of them as they sat atop the window to decide which one he wanted to inspect. I gingerly handed him the one with the tiger on it and he studied it like a five year old would, with a bit of wonder in his eyes.

"Can I drink from it?" he asked me.
"I thought you'd never ask." I told him.

I washed it and rewashed it and washed it again. As I filled it up with juice, my heart swelled a bit. He gently lifted it to his lips and took a sweet sip. After all of the daydreams and wishing and praying for my future, there he was.

Finally, my kiddo drank from my beloved cup.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Monday, January 18, 2010

The inept throwback.

I am an inept throwback to the 1950's housewife. Our grandmothers just seemed to know how to be domestic engineers with flair. I could blather on and on about how it's the most important job known to man or ramble almost incoherently about how it's a thankless job it (especially since my 9 month old has kept me up all night and woken up for the day at 5 am that last 3 nights). I love being a Stay at Home Mom but I am constantly laughing at the fact that I am the one running this household. For the most part, I love this job and in my heart I want to keep the house tidy. I wish that I could throw together an elaborate dinner made from scratch every night. In my heart, the kids are always clean and dressed. The reality is that most of the time they have remnants of lunch on their faces and Griffin spends the afternoon running around on the couch in his underwear while a store bought casserole cooks in the oven.

It's comical that I am the one in charge of the laundry because I am challenged when it comes the completing the task. We typically have two laundry baskets in the living room full of clean and unfolded clothes. We simply select the clothes we want to wear from the baskets. We spend some time searching for various items and nine times out of ten, Griffin goes to school in socks that don't match. My husband goes to work with two different socks on all of the time. It's awesome.

It's ridiculous that I am in charge of keeping the house tidy because I am the messiest person on the planet. Once, in High School, my best friend was rummaging through my drawers and found a half eaten Snicker bar stuck to a pair of tights. I wasn't even ashamed when she pointed it out to me. I just shrugged and went on with my life.

I adore the concept of the 1950's housewife as absurd and outdated as it may seem. The whole notion of running a smooth household is a mystery to me. I just love the idea of creating this wonderful space for your family to live in. I love the romantic notion of being this well groomed woman that has her sh*t together and drives to the grocery store in fancy shoes. Yet...I can laugh my inability to ever be that woman.

As I float through my home and look at all of the crap that needs to be done to keep it nice and tidy I am not willing to make the sacrifices needed to have that perfect home. I would rather let the dishes sit in the sink and play Go Fish with Griffin instead. I would rather let the laundry sit unfolded as we dance around the living room. The mopping can wait as I sit on the floor and play with Koen. My home is not perfect but in my heart, I am the type of Woman who can do it all. In reality, not so much.

Thank God my family loves me despite the fact that I am domestic joke.

Please scroll down to see the winner of Freakshow Friday

Winner: So smooth edition

We have a winner for the latest installment of Freakshow Friday. Please take note that my super freaky and non-biased best friend was the judge yet again. Here are the top three in no particular order.

Moooooog35..
Try as he might, Jimmy's dad just couldn't be any less proud.

Candice

This photo was taken only moments before
Jackson decided to shove the umbrella up his own ass.

Allyson

said..."...I'm siiiiiing in the rain...my buddies think I'm gayyyyyyy...my parents think it's a phaaaaaaase...my boyfriend's name is chaaaaaaaase..."

The winner is...

This photo was taken only moments before
Jackson decided to shove the umbrella up his own ass.

Candice the funniest Blogger in all the land.
Please head on over to her Blog
and marvel at this fantastic award she just earned
to proudly display forever.


Thanks to all the people who played.
Tune in this Friday for another instalment of Freakshow Friday!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Freakshow Friday: So smooth edition

It's time for another instalment of Freakshow Friday. Where I ask my readers to come up with a caption or story for a photo taken from Awkward Family Photos. In my high school, this kid would have been begging for a beat down.


Scott celebrates his "Most likely to whack off" trophy.

You got a better one for me?
If so, you may just when this awesome award
and have bragging rights forever.


I'll also linkup to your Blog and make a big deal
about how flippin' funny you are.
Simply leave your funny caption or story
in my comments section.

The winner will be announced on Monday.

I love animals that could scratch my face off.

Honestly, my heart is heavy for the people of Haiti this morning.

Only one thing could possibly cheer me up
without fail and that is photos of tiny animals.

So I spent some time over at Cute Overload
and found comfort in...

This little fella

and these wide eyed buggers

and cute little bunny feet

and a hedgehog dressed as a cowboy

and a hamster that is very proud of her Jello mold.

and a Jedi squirrel

and this little couple just breaks my heart right in two

I think that this one looks like Nellie Olson.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Crazy just got a little less insane in my brain.

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This Recliner lives in my head.

This is where I choose to sit (in my mind) at any point during my day when I feel that I am in danger of my head exploding. If everything is crazy all around me, I am in this chair. I had to do something...I needed a place to just sit and relax because the daily grind of being a Mom was starting to rob me of my joy.

Little things started to get to me. Things that shouldn't matter. Like the 20 minutes before I take Griffin to school. For some reason I was feeling really tense every single day at this time. From having to tell Griffin ten times to put on his shoes to watching him dawdle his slow little butt to the car as we froze half to death in unseasonably cold weather that we are all ill prepared for. I would get vexed with how heavy Koen felt in my arms as I rushed to get Griffin settled in his classroom so that I could get the baby back home where it was warm. It was like a mad insane dash that was designed to drive me crazy. I have to repeat this process everyday, so why be all tense about it?

I decided to get a recliner for my brain. I know that it's an ugly chair but it's so comfy. I sit in it at the grocery store too. When Griffin is touching everything in sight even when I asked him to keep his hands in his pockets and he knocks down this and that off the shelves. We simply leave a little trail behind us as I plop down into my mental recliner. When he begs over and over for me to buy him whatever crappy food he saw advertised on Nickelodeon, I just take a seat. Sometimes, I pop out the footrest and recline back when I am in traffic and the baby is crying and Griffin is screaming over the baby that he wants candy or that he wants to watch Spongebob and play video games at the top of his lungs over and over and over. Even better is when he starts freaking out that the Koen is freaking out and both of them are in tears. I mean, moments like this will continue happening throughout my career as a Mom. So why get all worked up about it?

Since getting this mental recliner, I am a much more laid back Mom. Once I made the decision to relax a bit, my kids got cuter and less annoying. The housework (though forever daunting) didn't seem to overwhelm me so much. My shoulders aren't glued to my ears anymore. I even caught myself laughing yesterday when I discovered that I accidentally washed yet another dirty diaper in a load of laundry and not the cloth kind either. No, this was Huggies and do you know what happens when you wash a Huggies diaper in the laundry? You don't want to know.

I love my chair. It keeps me sane.

Monday, January 11, 2010

The part where I make good on my promise.

Yesterday was day one of my new life.
I started Weight Watchers
just like I promised myself I would.
I was only starving from 4:30-6:00 pm.
I drank a ton of water in hopes that I could
trick my stomach into believing that it had eaten a Big Mac.
It just made me have to pee like crazy.

Earlier in the day, I accidentally hogged out on 100 calorie snacks.
I ate five points worth of Baked Doritos and
a Little Debbie 100 calorie snack cake.
I don't think that it works that way.

Next time, I'm just gonna eat an apple.

Don't worry though,
I did my best impression of Olivia Newton John
and got physical after the kiddos went to bed.
I did 30 minutes of a virtual workout on Wii Active.
Now my butt is sore
but it will be so worth it soon.

I am a repeat offender of Weight Watchers
so I know the drill.
You count the points,
you drink the water,
you work out,
you don't get drunk
on Vodka drinks
at 7 pm
on a Monday evening,
and BAM,
you get skinny before you know it.

So, I'll report from time to time
when I feel all proud of myself for losing the pounds.
I might even post some yummy recipes now and again.
I'll probably also confess any
moments of weakness that get a hold of me.
Like that one time
when I was doing Weight Watchers before
and I freaked out
and ate 3 candy bars
in one sitting.

It's staggering how much I can shove in my mouth during a good binge.

Enough about me and my fat mouth.
I'm off to drink some water and snack on air.

Thank you for your support.

Winner: Little Boy Blue Edition

We have a winner for the latest installment of Freakshow Friday. Please take note that my super freaky and non-biased best friend was the judge yet again. Here are the top three in no particular order.

Singedwingangel
"I look FAB-U-LOUS and I'm SPARKLY"

metsuke
"RAWWRRRR...needleth to thay I heart blueberries
and puthycats and walks through the gumdrop foreth."

Working Mommy
"CUT, CUT, CUT...
Wonka, Baby...
for the LAST time...
the script says, "Violet turns into a blueBERRY...not a blue FAIRY!!!"
Get it right next time...
mmmmmmkk?!?!"

The winner is...

metsuke

"RAWWRRRR...needleth to thay I heart blueberries
and puthycats and walks through the gumdrop foreth."

metsuke is the funniest Blogger in all the land.
Not only that but I happen to actually know this dude
he went to my high school and
I don't know if he was aware of it but I always
thought that he was Super Fine!

Of course, I'm a happily married chick now

but who wouldn't love to find out 17 years later
that someone had an unrequited crush on you
and would get stoked every time you
walked by in the halls of MacArthur High School?


I digress, yet again.

Please head on over to his Blog
and marvel at this fantastic award he just earned
to proudly display forever.


Thanks to all the people who played.
Tune in this Friday for another instalment of Freakshow Friday!

Saturday, January 9, 2010

This is flippin awesome!

ENJOY!



Now, it would be even more awesome if you would scroll on down, hit the link down there, and vote for my babies!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Shameless self promotion

Okay peeps. I need your help in a big way. A photo of my kids has been entered into a contest and if we win we get a HUGE canvas print of this glorious photograph. You know that I want that prize!




So please, be a lamb and hit this link and go VOTE VOTE VOTE for my babies. The pic to choose is labeled Newborn 7.


Thanks friends!

Keep scrolling down to enter this week's Freakshow Friday.
It's a doozy this week!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Freakshow Friday: Little Boy Blue Edition

It's time for an installment of Freakshow Friday where I challenge my readers to come up with a story or caption to a funny photo. This week's photo comes from Peter Pan Pages.
This dude is for real, you have to go check him out. I just showed this photo to my Mom and even she wants to beat him up. Bless his heart.

Look at this queer fruit that fell from the tree.

(not that there's anything wrong with that)

You got a better one for me?
If so, you may just when this awesome award
and have bragging rights forever.


I'll also linkup to your Blog and make a big deal
about how flippin' funny you are.
Simply leave your funny caption or story
in my comments section.

The winner will be announced on Monday.

This must be what closure feels like, I guess.

Disclaimer: Sorry this post is longer than usual. This is free therapy for me. Now, on with session.

<span class=
Me (#28) on the day that I tried out for my school dance team and mere moments before I found out that I didn't make it and then felt so rejected that I wanted to drop out of school but that's not what this post is about. That's a whole other therapy session just waiting to surface. Also, I might have played with the photo just a bit in Photobucket to protect the identity of a certain someone.

I'm not going to name names in this post but one of the girls in the above picture made my Eighth grade school year a living hell. Middle school is hard enough but this young lady (I'm not going to tell you which one it was, jeez stop asking, would ya?) and I had a an epic fight that eventually landed me excommunicated from the popular table in the cafeteria. In retrospect, I totally deserved it.

So, to protect the innocent, let's call this girl Sarah. Sarah and I had been friends since third grade and lived one neighborhood away from each other. We would get together and have sleepovers during the summer. Well, somehow, in Eighth grade we found ourselves hanging with the popular crowd. Really this just meant that we sat at a table and ate lunch near a bunch of pretty girls that said the word "Like" alot. Well, we became friends with another girl. We'll call her Sally.

Me, Sarah, and Sally were BFF's until I opened my big mouth. I was a bit of a gossip and I would say bad things about Sarah to Sally. Then Sally would talk bad about Sarah and then I would go and report back to Sarah what Sally had said. It was a fantastic way to stir up some drama. Well, Sarah and Sally compared notes and totally cornered me on a three way call. That's right...I got caught talking smack on the phone and they got pissed.

The fallout was unbearable. I was ostracized from the popular table. They told everyone that mattered at school about what a two faced brat I had been. People whispered and pointed at me when I walked by. I was sad, alone, and received nasty notes in my locker. I was like Ronny Miller in the movie Can't Buy Me Love when everyone found out that he had bought his popularity from Cindi Mancini and he was forced to sit all alone during lunch. Man, that's a great movie.

Anyway, it got so bad that I would come home crying after school and eventually had to fess up to my mom about what had happened. She did what any other red blooded mom would do and organized a meeting with all of the parents of the two preteen culprits, her, my dad, the janitor, the school nurse, and the school guidance counselor. Okay, the janitor and the school nurse weren't invited but the point is, it was mortifying.

Sarah and Sally begrudgingly shook my hand and made fake apologies with their eyes shooting darts into my soul. The nasty notes stopped, they quit talking bad about me, and eventually it settled down. I found a new group of friends who did not sit at the popular table but were really awesome and loyal friends. The rest of my Eighth grade year kicked ass and during my sophomore year in high school, me and Sarah could be in the same room and actually smile at each other. Hence, the photo up there.

I learned so much from that nasty fight. It made a huge impression on me and is a landmark from my adolescence.

Why am I even telling you about this? I recently found Sarah on Facebook. I quickly sent her an invitation be my friend and sent her this little message...

"Wow...you look great! Remember our huge fight in 8th grade? I deserved it. I had a big mouth."

A few days went by and then I got this reply from her

"Hey to you woman!!! Honestly, I don't remember the fight but so glad to hear from you. Where are you now? What's going on in your world?"

What? She can't remember the fight? Not just any fight but the epic fight of 1988 that sent me spiraling into a world of self doubt. A fight so huge that I cried myself to sleep night after night.

Wow!

I mean, this just goes to show that what may seem huge to me now will be a mere memory at some point in the future. Talk about a life lesson that just keeps on giving. I have learned so much from Sarah and she may never even realize it. I learned to be a more loyal friend. I learned to be careful about what I say to people or about people. Even now, at the ripe age of 35, I just learned that it's best to let the past go and live in the moment and that that moment may seem huge now but really it's all just fleeting.

It's astounding to me that 22 years later,
I'm still growing from that one mistake that I made.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Space Oddity in my living room.


The boys are starting to actually play together every now and then.
I'm sure that you can imagine the running commentary
that takes place between a 5 year old and a 9 month old.



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<span class=


Okay, so admittedly, those were clearly the lyrics to David Bowie's Space Oddity.
Really it went something like this...

Griffin: "Five, Four, (No Koen, quit grabbing my shirt!) Three, Two, One, BLAST OFF!"

Koen
: "Blarg goo goop."

Griffin
: "Okay, so you're an astronaut and... KOEN, QUIT TRYING TO ESCAPE!"

Koen
: "b boo bah bah?"

Griffin
: "MOM, KOEN IS TOO LITTLE TO PLAY AND HE"S RUINING MY SPACE FLIGHT!"

(Griffin storms out of spaceship while Koen sprawls out and takes over the joint.)

THE END.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

The year my spark will ignite

So, I have this little spark that lives within me that desperately wants to ignite. I've decided that 2010 is the year that I will stop snuffing it out and allow my spark to shine. I hold myself back all the time and frankly, I'm sick of it. Why not just go for it and be the absolute best person that I can be? Why not let myself be skinny? Why not finally succumb to my creativity and finish my damn novel. Why not grab my camera and just start taking pictures? What is it that has been holding me back? Me.

This goes beyond a resolution, this is a paradigm shift. I'm ready now to do all of the things that I have been too afraid to do. Things like...

*Let my baby "cry it out" so that he can actually learn to fall asleep on his own and I will get a good night's sleep for the first time in almost a year. I will still get to snuggle with him and he will still love me and know that I love him and we both be well rested and much happier. Case closed.

*Join Weight Watchers, count up my damn points, get off my fat ass and work out. I have lost and gained back the same 40 pounds three times in the last 15 years. It doesn't matter that I've had two kids. I need to learn to enjoy losing weight as much as I love to gain it. I love food and I can still love food but in moderation.

*Grow my hair out. I chopped it off in a hormonal tizzy and I miss my long curls so much. So, I will purchase headbands, barrettes, and cute hats. I will pull my hair into tiny pigtails the moment my hair can squeeze into a rubber band and I will get my long hair back.

*Write my novel. I have the entire story outlined. The whole thing is stuck in my head. I can't type the words fast enough. I am my own worst critic. I question myself and it's not serving me well to hold myself back anymore. So, I will write for 20 minutes everyday until I have my first draft done. I will edit and revise and edit again. I will send it off, I will write query letters, and I will get published. My book will be in bookstores. People will want to read it.

*I will finally allow myself to delve into photography. I've been timid and insecure about being an artist for too long. I have a vision and I will pick up my camera and I will capture all that is in my mind and I won't be afraid to put my creativity in a frame and hang it on the wall for the world to see.

This little spark will shine.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Happiness is...

Photobucket

A squishy baby taking a
bath in the kitchen sink.

Winner: Cottontail Edition

We have a winner for the latest instalment of Freakshow Friday. My super freaky and unbiased best friend was the judge this week. I didn't envy her job because y'all brought it this round. All of the entries had me rolling on the floor. Alas...only a few can make it in the top three. Here they are in no particular order.

Working Mommy
"Wanna see my bend and snap?"

JennyMac
"let me show you where to put the carrot..."

Teresha
"Silly rabbit, Lucite heels are for strippers"

The winner is...

JennyMac


"let me show you where to put the carrot..."

JennyMac is on the quite the roll
and is indeed the funniest Blogger in all the land.
Please head on over to her Blog
and marvel at this fantastic award she just earned
to proudly display forever.


Thanks to all the people who played.
Tune in this Friday for another instalment of Freakshow Friday!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

The pictures that pushed me over the edge.

We had a little family photo shoot over the holidays
with my family, my parents, my big brother, and his kids.

These will forever be known as the "before photos"
I'm not kidding, Roger and I both decided
to join Weight Watchers
after seeing these photos.
As soon as payday rolls around,
I'll be on their scale crying my eyeballs out
and forking over the registration fee.

At least the kids look cute. Yeah...just look at the kids!

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I especially love the ones of Griffin pretending to be a rockstar.